The Quack Doctor

Source: Trewman’s Exeter Flying Post, 20 July 1826

In 2003, the Daily Mail ran a story titled: Beeswax is ‘miracle’ cure. The article referred to an 18th/19th-century ointment called The Poor Man’s Friend, a popular remedy for wounds and skin conditions. The reason it hit the 21st-century press was that its inventor’s original secret recipe had come up for auction.

Giles Laurence Roberts, proprietor of the Poor Man’s Friend, didn’t have a great start in life. Born in April 1766 in Bridport, Dorset, he contracted smallpox when he was nine months old. Although he recovered, he then got rickets and was unable to walk until the age of five.

Young Giles, however, pulled through, and by his early teens had developed a keen interest in medical botany, studying Culpeper and formulating his own herbal medicines. He achieved some local fame as a healer, particularly for cases of fever and ague, and was also fascinated by electricity, conducting experiments with a homemade electrical apparatus. Unable to make it work at first, he persevered and eventually managed to give himself an electric shock.

At 18, he went to work for a mechanic, but his master soon died and Roberts expressed a wish to become an apothecary’s apprentice. His family didn’t approve and he ended up in Bristol working for an optician. Sharing his lodgings was a respectable surgeon called Mr Pitt, who encouraged him in his interest in healing and anatomy.

Back home in 1788, Roberts set up shop as a druggist and, although unqualified, began practising as an apothecary. After six years’ successful business, he travelled to London to study Anatomy and Midwifery, attending lectures at Guy’s and St Thomas’s, and only a year later arrived back in Dorset as a fully licensed surgeon, apothecary and accoucheur. Only one thing was missing – the title ‘Doctor.’

King’s College Aberdeen awarded him a medical degree on 20 April 1797 – this appears to have been arranged by his tutors in London, and he did not have to do any further study or pass exams. Aberdeen was well-known for awarding medical qualifications on receipt of cash, so it’s possible that some money changed hands. Dr Roberts’s background of diligent study, however, made him far more deserving of his new title than many of the ‘Doctors’ featured on this site.

His successors describe his physical appearance as follows:

He was short in stature, being only about five feet high, dark complexion, a beautiful black eye, and in his younger days long black hair falling on his shoulders. In his dress, and appearance generally, he was singular and original, bearing mostly the character of a Quaker or Friend.

He began selling his own branded remedies at the end of the 1790s, starting with the Pilulae Antiscrophulae for scrophula and scorbutic eruptions. The Poor Man’s Friend remained a local product until about 1820 when it got an endorsement from an aristocratic patient and sales took off.

During the 1820s, Roberts began publishing a yearly pamphlet called the The annual mentor; or, Cottager’s companion: comprising concise maxims and golden rules for preserving the mind and body in health, and conducive to wealth, long life, and happiness, a Friend to the Poor, and a Companion for the Rich.

It’s no surprise that this free publication was mainly a plug for the Poor Man’s Friend and the Pilulae Antiscrophulae. At 32 pages, however, it contained a lot of other useful information. Short essays gave advice on health issues such as personal hygiene:

If dirty people cannot be removed as a common nuisance, they ought at least to be avoided as infectious. Superior cleanliness sooner attracts our regard than even finery itself, and often gains esteem where the other fails.

and there were lists of Wholesome Counsellings, including:

He that will not sail until all dangers are over, must never put to sea.
An ass was never cut out for a lap-dog
The wise man even when he holds his tongue says more than the fool when he speaks.
Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner.

There were also articles on choosing a wife, on the slovenly practice of burning green wood, on how to escape from a fire, and many more aspects of life. Although on the surface this all sounds tediously didactic, the information was presented in an engaging, accessible way that doesn’t come across as too worthy, and it beats Britain’s Got Commercial Breaks for an evening’s entertainment.

Roberts remained in Bridport for the rest of his life, dying in 1834. He left the recipes to Thomas Beach and John Barnicott, who took over the shop – the building is now Grade-II listed and houses a restaurant called Beach & Barnicott.

Roberts was in the middle of compiling the 1835 edition of the Annual Mentor when he died. Beach and Barnicott went ahead with publication, but in a shortened 24-page format. Later editions were reduced to 12 pages, most of which was adverts and testimonials. There were still a few general articles to draw the reader in, but the publication didn’t have the same entertainment value as when Roberts was alive.

The Poor Man’s Friend remained available until the mid-20^th century, but made the news in 2003 when Bridport Museum bought the secret recipe for £480. Its composition, in the words of the Daily Mail, was ‘nothing more than 95% lard and beeswax’. Nothing, that is, except the other 5% - a fragrant but dangerous concoction of mercurous chloride, sugar of lead, mercuric oxide, zinc oxide, bismuth oxide, red pigments and oils of rose, bergamot and lavender.

Above right: Mid 19th-century dispensing pot. Photograph courtesy of the Science Museum, London.

……Ali Ahmed’s Treasures of the Desert consist of the
……………..following invaluable Remedies:
….THE  SPHAIROPEPTIC,    or  ANTIBILIOUS   PILL,   a   purely
vegetable   compound   and   effectual   remedy   in  cases  of  in-
digestion,   bilious   and  liver  complaints—The  PECTORAL  AN-
TIPHTHISIS,  or   Cough  Pill,  for  cough,  asthma,  and  incipient
consumption—The ANTISEPTIC  MALAGMA,  a  most  invaluable
plaister for the cure of ulcers, varicose veins, whitlows,  boils,  &c.
In boxes, 1s 1½d, 2s 9d, and 4s 6d. The pills are silver gilt, in the
oriental style, by which  any  disagreeable  taste  is  removed.—
Depot,  9 and 10,  St. Bride’s-avenue,  Fleet-street;  and of all re-
spectable medicine venders in the united kingdom.

Source: Lloyd’s Weekly Newspaper (London), Sunday 17 April 1853

As well as brief newspaper ads like the one above, Ali Ahmed’s Treasures of the Desert were also advertised in more detailed pamphlets, such as the 8 pages of info included with the serialised first edition of Bleak House.

This Essay on Oriental Medicine began by being up-front about the reader’s likely reaction:

WHAT! more atrocities in the quack line? More conspiracies against the poor stomach? Such we can easily believe to be the exclamation of the reader as he scans the heading of this paper. If he be a man in the enjoyment of robust health, we heartily hope he may long continue so; but still, we should strongly advise him to lay this by for a wintry day, and in the season of sickness he will thank his stars that he has been so wise.

Then it went on to relate how Ali Ahmed Mascueli, a genius of noble Persian birth, was exiled to Aleppo where he invented pretty much every surgical instrument known to mankind and discovered that in simple vegetable productions of the earth, the Almighty had showered upon his creatures the simplest and yet the surest remedies against almost every evil to which their own negligence of the blessings of health almost invariably exposes them.

On his death-bed, Ali Ahmed confided the invaluable secret of these compositions to his near relatives, in whose hands they have continued till within the last few years, until their astounding effects were observed by an excellent and philanthropic Englishman. Who, surprise surprise, decided that he couldn’t withold these wonderful secrets from the people of Britain…

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Image: I couldn’t find any pictures representing Ali Ahmed himself, so have had to make do with this one of 10th century Persian physician Muhammad ibn Zakariya ar-Razi

Grasshopper Ointment was registered in 1874 and the name was trademarked in 1884. It was still listed in Martindale’s Extra Pharmacopoeia in 1989, where the ingredients were given as rosin, yellow beeswax, larch oleoresin, arachis oil, white soft paraffin and copper acetate – but no grasshoppers. The copper would have given it a green tint appropriate to the name.

I have no idea why it was called grasshopper ointment but because it was also recommended for chilblains – and this is purely speculation – there could be a connection with the Provençal tradition of using praying mantises (known as tignos) as a chilblain remedy. You had to cut the mantis in half and rub the resulting juice onto the chilblain, whereupon absolutely nothing happened, according to J Henri Fabre in the The Life of the Grasshopper (1919).

There was also a widespread old practice of applying a live grasshopper or cricket to a wart in the hope that it would eat it off – in which case the ointment was probably a better bet.

OH MY LEG!

AH,   poor   sufferer!      Do  you  know  the  cause?   If  not,  I
will  tell you.   Your  leg  is  poisoned.   All  that   poulticing
and   fomenting   with  water  and  lotion  only  increases your
misery.  The  poison  must  be  extracted.   Send  at once  for
ALBERT’S GRASSHOPPER OINTMENT.   A  certain  cure
for bad legs and every known disease.
78, Farringdon-street, London, and all chemists, 1s. 1½d., 2s.,
2s. 9d.
Sir,—For  nearly  two  years  I  had  suffered  great  pain  from
a white swelling or housemaid’s knee, brought on by constant
kneeling   at   my  work  as  a  carriage cleaner  on  the  North
London Railway.
After  refusing  an  operation,  I  was cured by your Ointment
in five weeks.
………….R. JEFFERY, 63, Bridge-street, Canal-road, Bow.

Source: Reynolds’s Newspaper, Sunday 19 July 1885

The company also made Grasshopper Pills for headaches, insomnia, liver, kidney and digestive complaints. The picture below is kindly provided by Leo Reynolds, who took it at Niagara Apothecary Museum.

The proprietor of this remedy, Thomas Greenough, was better known for his other preparation, the Lozenges of Tolu, which were for coughs and colds. The Samaritan Water, patented in 1779, was not widely advertised, but the lozenges continued to be sold by Greenough’s successor at Ludgate Hill, R. Hayward, during the first half of the 19th century.

Greenough’s other remedies included the Tincture for the Tooth-Ach, Tincture for the Teeth and Scurvy, and the Volatile Salt of Vinegar, which supposedly prevented the plague and smallpox.

(Image: Christ and the Samaritan Woman, Anon, 18th century)

                           By the KING’S PATENT.
           THE UNIVERSAL BALSAMICK, CALLED
                            SAMARITAN WATER.
THIS admirable Water merits, in  the  greatest  degree,
the  attention  of the  public,  being   the   best   remedy
yet discovered for almost every  outward  or  local  com-
plaint, and more particularly for  the  following: viz.
    1. For Strains,  Bruises,  and  Injuries  from  Blows  or
Falls.
    2. For fresh wounds of every kind.
    3.   For  old  Sores  and Ulcers, even of the very worst
Nature.
    4.   For   inflammatory  Tumours,  Boils,  Whitlows, &c.
    5.   For  the  Erysipelas,  or  St.  Anthony’s   Fire,   the
Shingles, Tetters, and all sharp scorbutic Eruptions,  es
pecially for that commonly obstinate complaint, a Scald-
head.
    6.  For  hard  Swellings  in  the  Breasts,  whether  pro
ceeding  from  Blows,  coagulated  Milk,   or   any   other
cause.
    7. For preventing Cancers; or,  if  already  formed,  for
stopping their further progress, and easing the pain.
    8. For White Swellings on the  Joints,  swelled  Glands,
and all disorders of a scrophulous nature.
    9. For Weakness or Soreness of the Eyes, Specks up-
on the Cornea,  Heat  and  Inflammation  of  the  Eye-lids,
&c.
In all the above cases, and in many others, it is the safest
and most certain application that  can  be  made  use  of,
never failing to give relief, performing  Cures  in  half  the
time  commonly  required,  and  even  where every other
means have been tried in vain. And will  be  found,  upon
trial, to be in reality, and Universal  Balsamick  and  Infal-
lible Remedy for almost all external complaints.
Sold by appointment of the  Patentee,  T.  GREENOUGH,
Chemist,  at   NO.   10,   Ludgate-Hill,   London;   and   by
HUSBAND,  ELDER  and  CO.  facing  the  Tron-Church,
Edinburgh. Price 2s. 6d. each Bottle.
N.B. A more particular account  of   the   nature   and   ef-
fects of the Samaritan Water may be had GRATIS at the
above places.

Source: The Edinburgh Advertiser, Tuesday 1 April 1783

Another very long advert today. Thomas Clarkson was a member of the Royal College of Surgeons, but his method of cure, which isn’t named in this ad, was a patent medicine by the name of Clarkson’s Specific for Bad Legs. Initially, Clarkson treated the afflicted in person, but because this often meant they had to find lodgings near his home for weeks on end, he soon began selling the remedy so that people could treat themselves. He also provided “Tonic Aperient Pills” to maintain general health.

Mr. Clarkson’s career as a General Practitioner lasted 53 years. In 1885 the Hospital Gazette and Students’ Journal reported: 

“At the last meeting of the Council, the name of Mr Thomas Clarkson, of Darley, Ripley, was struck off the roll of the College because he declined to discontinue advertising a sovereign remedy, which he professes to have discovered.”

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Image: Physician attending to a leg wound. 18thC, exact date unknown. Carl August Grossman. Courtesy of the US National Library of Medicine.

                       NO   CURE   NO   PAY
      MR.    CLARKSON,    SURGEON,    engages    to     Cure
a   Disease,   oftentimes   considered    incurable,    of   however
long  standing;  and,  to  enhance  the  value  of  the Cure,  Mr. C.
is enabled to give instructions which will make  it  a  lasting  cure.
Mr. C. guarantees not to make any charge without a perfect cure,
a convincing proof that  he can  infallibly  cure  the  Disease.  The
Disease  is  what  is called a  BAD  LEG, an old wound, mostly a
little   above   the  ancle.  Mr.  C.  could  give  fifty  cases  of  extra-
ordinary cures, after  the  most eminent Surgeons, and even Hos-
pitals  and  Infirmaries,  have  failed:  he  gives  a  few  Cases  as
references.
   1st. Miss Netherwood, of Silsden, has had a  bad  leg, and was
in despair some length of time. Mr. C. has cured her.
   2nd.   Mr.  John  Ayrton,  of   Manningham,   near  Bradford, has
been afflicted with a bad leg  or  old  ulcer  for a  long  time, trying
Surgeons,  Quacks, and  all things.—Mr. C. cured  him in a month.
   3rd.  Mr.  W.  Waterhouse, carpet   manufacturer,  of  Dewsbury,
has had a very  bad  leg  for  some  time.—Cured  in three weeks.
   4th.  Mrs.  Gill,  of   Hampsthwaite,   near  Harrogate,  has  been
sorely  afflicted  for   ten   years;   her   health  had  become  much
impaired  from  constant  pain and  irritation.  Four years ago she
was  eight  weeks in  Leeds  Infirmary  without  relief.—Mr. C. has
cured her.
   5th. Miss  Eliz.  Binns, of Felliscliffe,  near  Harrogate,  suffered
17 years. Ten years ago one Surgeon  wanted  to  cut  her leg off.
Several surgeons  and a Physician gave  partial  relief. She  was
three  times  in Leeds  Infirmary, and the  last  time was discharg-
ed incurable.—Cured in seven weeks.
   Copy of a letter received by  Mr. C. from  a Gentleman, a  Spirit
                   Merchant, at Slaithwaite, near Huddersfield.
   SIR,—You   have  earned  my   lasting  gratitude and respect for
the  wonderful  cure you have performed of my  wife,  in  5  weeks,
after enduring  pain  and  misery  for 17 or 18 years, with  a  large
wound  near  the  ancle,  and  trying   the   most   noted  surgeons
without   avail—despairing    of   relief   from   medical   aid,  until
seeing your advertisement  in the Leeds Mercury. Since the cure
she can rest at nights, and her health is now as good as  I  could
wish.  May  you  receive  the  reward   your   merit  entitles you to.
You  are at liberty  to  make  what  use  you  like  of  this  letter.   I
hope you will publish it.—I remain, Sir,
                        Yours sincerely,                        JOSEPH PARKIN.
    These, and near 100 more  that  Mr.  C.  has  cured,  have  inva-
riably   enjoyed  better  health  since  the cure than before.  Inquire.
                               All Letters must be pre-paid.
     Address—Mr.  Clarkson,  Day-house,  Darley,  Pately   Bridge.
   Mr.  C.,  being  a   duly  qualified  Practitioner, may be consulted
without  Fee  at  Mr.  Butler’s,   No.  10,   Commercial-Court,  Brig-
gate,  Leeds,  on  the  last  Tuesday  in  every Month, from  11 to  2.
   Mr. C. may also be consulted on any other Case.

Source: The Leeds Mercury, Saturday 16th March 1844

Note: The spelling ancle is used in the original.